SA: Schleppers Anonymous
Hi. I’m Norine and I’m … a schlepper. It’s not that I hoard stuff. I don’t have a vast collection of birthday and holiday cards from years gone by. Or bureaus full of T-shirts I used to wear in college. Like Jessica, I don’t obsessively file away every single doodle that results when my son […]
The Story Behind: Parental Time Dilation Principle #9
There is no such thing as a quick pit-stop when you’ve got a toddler in tow. Then, time slows to a glacial pace. Two-years-old, three-years-old, it doesn’t really matter. Waiting for a kid to do his business — especially when he’s still getting the hang of it — will make you feel like a clown […]
An (Im)Perfectly Beautiful Christmas Tree
If you are a Christmas tree aficionado … If you wait all year to let your inner Martha Stewart run rampant with ribbon and garland and tinsel, oh my! … If you summarily reject ornaments because they are not the “right” shade of Christmas red … If, to put it mildly, you are a Christmas […]
The Homework Obsession
Back when my son was in kindergarten, he’d come home every so often with an assignment to put together a poster presentation on a country in whatever part of the world his class was studying at the moment. And naturally, given that my then-four-year-old thought “baby sounds” not “search engine” when he heard the word […]
The Story Behind: Stomach Compartmentalization Theorem
Jessica and I are thrilled to have food+travel blogger Tracey Ceuvels here with us today. Tracey is the creator of the dinner-planning+foodie blog The Busy Hedonist and the shopping app NYC iFoodShop. She’s also mom to an almost-five-year-old daughter who, Tracey says, hates mashed potatoes but loves chicken satay and pappadum. When she’s not blogging, Tracey writes […]
The Homework Appropriation
If you thought homework was horrible the first time around, just wait till you’re stuck doing it with your child. I am quite sure that if Dante had had a third-grader when he was penning The Inferno, he’d have included Homework Projects With Kids as one of his many circles of hell. So there we […]
The Story Behind: Diaper Bag Differential
True confession time here: I am a schlepper. It’s not that I hoard stuff. I don’t have a vast collection of birthday and holiday cards from years gone by. Or bureaus full of T-shirts I used to wear in college. Like Jessica, I don’t obsessively file away every single doodle that results when my son puts […]
I’m Drowning in Summertime Crafts!
As we approach the final weeks of summer and I find myself up to my ass cheeks in pine cone encrusted picture frames and Popsicle stick sculptures, I realize I have GOT to get this camp-created crapwave, eh hem, “artwork situation” under control. So please enjoy one of my favorite The Story Behinds from this […]
The Story Behind: Parental Hubris Principle #11
Funnily enough (well, today anyway), it’s my experience that inspired this particular principle … and it’s corollary: Boasting to your IN-LAWS that you’re done potty training exponentially increases the odds you’ll have to sit through dinner in pee-soaked khakis. Like so many little boys, my kid loves stories that involve him peeing on me or vomiting […]
The Story Behind: The Inverse Play Date Principle
He-he-he. I bet the mom of every one of Fletcher’s friends is wondering, “Am I THAT mom?” Rest assured, if I still talk to you on the playground, then you’re not THAT mom. But there was, indeed, such a mom. And naturally her daughter was the one my kid had a HUGE crush on. He […]
The Worst Play Date — EVER!
It’s Friday, and I should be overjoyed. TGIF, right? But much as I love the weekend, weekends bring the inevitable question from my son: Did you make a play date for me? Ah, play dates. Really, they should be things of beauty and harmony … or at the very least, simple convenience. After all, the […]
The Story Behind: Crafty Apathy Ratio
This is one of the things I feel most guilty about as a parent. My son loves to draw and make things and I…. love a sticker-free kitchen. I am more than willing to throw some money at this creativity situation. I’ll buy craft supplies and little art kits all day long. However, when the […]
The Story Behind: Infancy Autophobia
Before I had my son, I’d worked as a nanny for a little girl and, eventually, her newborn brother. So, I went into this whole parenting thing thinking, Puh-leeez, I’ve GOT this! I’m a professional. I’ve been PAID to do this job. (Not well, mind you, but paid none the less.) I also went home […]
The Story Behind: Critical Opinion Ratio
That’s me, secretly shuffling through stacks of paper while my son is at school or in bed, quietly extracting the boners and hiding them under the coffee grounds in the trash. I’m a whittler, a tosser. I’m the person who reads a birthday card over the open recycling bin, smiling fondly as I release it […]
The Story Behind: Parental Time Dilation Principle #4
When my son was in first grade, the dreaded deluge of homework began. I don’t know about you, but I do NOT remember having homework until I was in about fourth grade, at an age where I could be reasonably expected to do my homework by my own damn self. At age 6, my son […]
The Story Behind: The Obsession Variable
Norine: I think I now know more about Pokemon critters than any adult needs to — ever! My DVR is filled with show episodes. We have hundreds of playing cards — all carefully sorted, alphabetized and categorized in a big binder — Binders Full of Pokemon! And not one, but two “reference” books that list […]
The Story Behind: Departure Desperation Ratio with guest blogger Laurie Sontag!
We are thrilled to have Gilroy, California writer Laurie Sontag, who blogs about family/life/teens at Manic Motherhood, http://lauriesontag.com chatting with us about The Story Behind: Departure Desperation Ratio! Jessica: Why is it that kids wait until the days that you are impossibly late to decide they MUST try out a new hairstyle or begin a […]
The Story Behind: THE BIG BOOK OF PARENTING TWEETS
No one told us we COULDN’T publish a book in just four weeks. So we did! It all started with the fortune cookies. And then before you could say Happy Chinese New Year! Jessica and I were working with Hall of Tweets’ Kate Hall to publish a holiday collection of the funniest commentary on parenting ever to fit […]
The Story Behind: Tastebud Chaos Theory
If you wanna get your kid to eat something, um … different. Let him see another kid … an older kid … a kid he thinks is really cool … eating it. In our case, it was Jessica’s son Holden who, as a five-year-old, introduced my son Fletcher, then three, to the joys of eating […]
